I’ve always had trouble keeping friends. Growing up I moved around a lot and as an adult I continued to wander like a lost gypsy looking for the right ‘home’. My sister has been the only constant in my life. Even though, our relationship has gaps and separations due to my mother; we’ve always remained close. Months, years would pass and we would pick up where we left off, never missing a beat.
I didn’t have to explain myself to her like I do with others. I don’t have to apologize for being myself like I constantly find myself doing. She just gets me. If it wasn’t for her, I truly would be lonely and really lost. I hate we live far apart now. I want to be part of her every day life.
I accidentally scared her when I almost was doomed to die. I wasn’t going to tell her but she knew something wasn’t right. She always does. She can feel my vibes from thousands of miles away. She called me out of the blue and asked me, “What’s wrong?” I tried to play dumb, “Nothing, why?” Of course, there’s no fooling her. That’s how strong our bond is. She shared a dream she had last night and shared how she’s been feeling; sad, depressed, and emotional. Ugh. I knew I couldn’t lie to her. Fine. The doctor told me I have a 50% survival rate (I knew he was aiming high), my heart is failing me due to my autoimmune disease in overdrive and it was attacking EVERYTHING, and I have to start chemo!!! I don’t even have cancer!!!! It was a last resort and the doctors were crossing their fingers it would help. Right away my sister wanted to come by my side and I wanted her here. But, I knew I couldn’t be selfish. She has a job, kids, husband, responsibilities. She gave me the “you’re a survivor” pep talk. Every day she checked in on me and sent me care packages. She even sent me some positive vibes.
Her love and caring made a BIG difference. My gloomy world was illuminated by her rainbow. My sister saved me. The moment she was able to, she ran to my side. Now with her here I know I can recover and be 100%. No friend can measure to my sister. We’ve been through soo much together our bond is titanium strong. Even though I don’t have many true friends, I have my sister and that’s enough for me. I love her more than I love myself. You would never know she’s 3 years younger because she loves to pretend to be older. I let her have the ‘Big Sissy’ title because in my eyes she is like a big sister. As a child I tried my best to protect her and raise her. My mom was even jealous my sister saw me as a mother figure. I would receive calls from my mom and the conversation would start with “your daughter…”. As an adult “my daughter” became wiser and stronger, now she wanted to protect and guide me. It was easy to hand over the reins to her because I knew she was ready and I was tired of being strong for both of us.
When I look at my sister, I feel soo proud of her. She overcame a life of abuse (sadly to say all 3), addiction, and numerous suicide attempts. Today, she is a parent of 2 beautiful (I don’t say that just because they’re related) kids, an elementary school teacher for under privileged children, sober, and embracing life.
I hope that one day my daughters will have the bond my sister and I have.
An unbreakable bond.
A bond that lasts forever.
A powerful bond that heals from far.
An unconditional bond.
A sister bond.
missamazin79 